| Finding meaning in freelance work is a tough proposition. Perhaps it feels like a struggle because you're actively looking for struggle. It's easy to tell ourselves positive results can only come from struggle—that's far from true. It sounds like you're good at what you do. Double your prices each project. Cut the number of projects you do 75%. Over-deliver. Hustle by improving your operation/system, not chasing a single variable (work input). This work system will allow you to spend less time laboring and more time working on yourself: 1. Sleep, diet, exercise, reflect. Here's a comment I recently wrote about this: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=16150664 2. Visit a good doctor and get blood tests. A few years ago I started having trouble focusing for more than 2-3 hours at a time. It turned out I have an under-active thyroid (Hashimoto's Thyroiditis) which causes my memory to become foggy, focus limited, and tempter short when my adrenal glands are under stress. This is fixed with some blood tests and the right medication. I would have never discovered this without finding a good quality doctor. I paid out of pocket to have access for a 45 minute session—worth every penny. Now I only have occasional flareups. ------ You're not broken—you're human. There are simple fixes for almost everything you describe that feels difficult. Take a step back (maybe literally, via vacation or a week off) and analyze how you can simplify your life and disconnect from this struggle = reward mindset. Something to ponder: money, love, or fame as the end goal are dangerous, but as a byproduct of earnest effort and a life well lived can be uplifting. |