[QAPereo]

I had the same issue, and essentially developed a lingo to speak to those kinds of people. More contractions, dropped g’s, “fucking” used as an adjective. It’s been a couple of decades, and every time I switch to that, I feel like an utter fraud, but sadly it works. I can’t imagine what I’d do if that hadn’t been an option though.

Edit: Support group at my place everyone, coffee and donuts will be provided. ;)

[carapace]

I remember once in high school in a kind of AV class I walked past a video camera that was hooked up to a monitor with a live feed. What happened was that as I was walking across the room, I saw out of the corner of my eye a very nerdy person walking across the room on the monitor, and then I suddenly realized that it was me! I walked nerdy! After that, I actually studied the other kids to see what they were doing different, and I adopted two specific changes: 1. Walk with a strut. To me this felt exaggerated and ridiculous until I got used to it, but it was just what the other [male] students did. 2. Hold my books in my hand loosely, as though they might fall out at any time but I don't notice or care. Those two deliberate self-conscious behavioral changes led to a night-and-day difference in how other kids related to me. I was still a nerd, I didn't become popular overnight or anything, but it made a huge difference. (I went to a big public school where you didn't know everybody. FWIW.)

"Act like a dumb-ass and they'll treat you like an equal."

[scotty79]

Yess. There is more than one language you have to learn as a smart kid. One is for smart adults, other is for average or worse adults (I'm sad that OP immediate family was part of that group) yet another is for other kids. Same as second one plus ton of swearwords.

[lostmsu]

You forgot to add "fucking" in couple of places. :-D

[tzs]

A friend from college told me about a buddy of his who took a summer job working at a naval shipyard, assisting mechanics. Those salty old sailors used "fuck" quite liberally. Any noun had a good chance of having a "fucking" in front of it.

The pinnacle occurred one day when they opened up an engine that wasn't working, and saw that it was totally beyond repair. The head mechanic turned to his crew and gave the verdict: "This fucking fucker's fucked".

[invalidOrTaken]

"fuckin'"