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by apatters 3079 days ago
> Damn difficult to meet genuine folks after college (Would love any suggestions on where to find them... Definitely not facebook :/ )

This may not be very popular advice around these parts, but it works. Go to the local pub, have a few beers and talk to people. Cultivate an interest in televised sports or whatever else people like to talk about (can't stay I've ever been a huge sports fan, but like a lot of things, the more you know about it, the more interesting it becomes).

Pretty rare that you will meet someone there who becomes a really close friend, but alcohol will make you more comfortable around people, you'll cultivate better social and conversation skills, and some of this will rub off on the rest of your life positively as well.

Exercise moderation of course. But my only regret is that I didn't become a bit of a barfly sooner, it provides instant social connections and even business contacts. For instance a few months ago I had a chat with an HR consultant at a bar. We hit it off, it turned out he enjoyed helping startups, and now he gives me free advice on hiring, performance management, and other things whenever I ask.
2 comments
jcbrand 3079 days ago
Honestly, I have absolutely no interest in feigning interest in televised sports to make friends, and luckily this is definitely not necessary.

Here in Europe I quickly tell people I don't watch football and don't care about the teams or match results.

If that's a deal breaker for someone, then they're not friendship material.

Instead of going to the pub, I'd rather recommend hobbies that you can share with people. I've made good friends via martial arts, guitar lessons, shared oriental drumming lessons, tech meetups, FLOSS sprints, conferences etc.

Note, all these things (including going to the pub) require you to get out of your comfort zone and into the "real world". Such is life.

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starlord 3079 days ago
I will agree with this. I would prefer to find a fit rather than fit in.

And this does not mean being obstinate, but rather pursuing only what I find interesting rather than what most people find interesting.

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a3n 3079 days ago
> Go to the local pub, have a few beers and talk to people.

You could genericize this to: Go to a place where people meet for some $ACTIVITY, participate in what they do there, and talk to people.

Now assign some agreeable value to $ACTIVITY.

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