[kvonhorn]

> Don't listen to random advice from random internet people.

> [Go] to [a] specialist and by that I mean psychotherapist.

It sounds like you've got a great setup. The way you're feeling could destroy what you've built, however, and you may not recognize how. Drop a few Benjamins and get professional advice from a psychologist.

You might also consider seeing a doctor and getting a physical, and start the Couch to 5K if your doctor advises you to get some exercise.

[twunde]

Assuming you have health insurance and are based in the US, your plan most likely covers this. Check your insurer's website or talk to your doctor's office. Many insurance plans also have remote mental health services.