| Ok this is pretty random but I think it's a bad habit to actively like the idea of assess the need for thanks as a requirement. Why because you're setting yourself up for failure. It's nice to get thanks and consider it a surrendeptious gift or happy moment but to consider it any more than that just highlights all the times you need thanks. Furthermore, you shouldn't do anything for the thanks of others. If you do what's best for you you'll probably be satisfied and if you so something for someone else be it an individual an organization or otherwise it should be because of a reason that you've resolved the thing you're doing is worth the donation of effort and time whether it's to help a friend, family member or an organization (excluding paid jobs like volunteering and I say do something as in volunteer effort or time). People who need to be thanked and actually end up working for charities churches and other such things for credit, self worth or priase end up being the most obnoxus and ultimately selfish people in those organizations and lose sight of the best next thing to do for the purpose of that thing or person or organization because they are consumed with having their own praise highlighted. With personal friend said family needing thanks is like holding something over someone's head. For example, I don't take ask or accept money from family (no judgment to people who do or really need to) because in my family they will hold it over your head forever and want a million other things from you and endlessly guilt trip you so it's not worth it to me but I've also been fortunate to never really have been in such a desperate spot. The point, people who perpetuate that attitude end up being the people who, like the other day, someone scoffed at me sarcastically and only at that point did I realize that they had apparently opened the door for me and I had not noticed and insulted them by not saying thanks. Now, this seems rude of me for sure but let's pause in this for a second to look at this further, given the situation I was in it was not reasonable that I would notice at all for a host of reasons, but furthermore, when you do a small something for a random stranger you should accept you know literally nothing about their life or current situation so to immediately judge their behavior towards you for something they never asked you or bothered you for is actually ridiculous, and finally if you opened the door for someone and are so worked up about it that merely not getting an oral thanks makes you vocally angry hostile and upset this is mildly disturbing right? Who are you angry at? What were you expecting. If you're opening the door for someone to genuinely help them and make their day better, another way to look at if is all the more grateful you should feel if you opened the door for someone who was so busy or having such a bad day they wouldn't even notice. You just made their life better and they didn't even realize it. But aha, it's the fact that you need recognition from a random stranger that is the issue with you, and not the person who've you've chosen to be mad at because you've decided they have acted unjustly towards you. I always look for people who are seeking recognition and extra appreciation and are wary of them because in my mind they need it, they will topple over people to get it, or will feel entitled to things and their satisfaction depends on external praise which makes me nervous and question their own internal compass. Especially in business. On the flipside, especially personally outside of professional situations but also in professional situations, I find people who are giving, humble and expect nothing in return I can potebtially trust because I know they are helping me without wanting something in return. Also people I find who are truly successful in their own right are giving in general and have helpful hearts and want to see other people do well. People always playing the ioweu uowme game is too stressful. That being said I'm an engineer so when my professional work environment starts to feel like a game of politics I'm outty. So maybe this is an outlier opinion but I think people tend to gravitate towards humble trusting workers. Maybe people who need thanks and recognition don't do well in corporate environments because pay is not enough and getting recognition consistently is something almost noone gets not even ceos and faces of famously successful companies, they are the most prone to scruinty and judgment and controversy and that will always scale to be true the more you seek out positions where praise is apart of the incentive package. |