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by pbhjpbhj
3174 days ago
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I think when you say hermit you mean a recluse (and probably in the OP too), someone who separates themselves from society, if they do it for religious/philosophical reasons then I'd call them a hermit. Did your friends dad ever get invited to your own parents' house, did he go? Perhaps he just had no friends rather than choosing to be a recluse? I match the description you give of your friends dad quite well, except without the money. I've one friend who'll send a birthday card, none that will ring me and suggest we hang out; I try to do things for my children to encourage them not to fall in to my pattern (perhaps that's what the pay-per-view was, a treat for his son and you?). I like people, enjoy shared work to a common goal, get involved when I can with things like helping out at school clubs and Scout events (was previously a leader with Cub Scouts) but somehow things just don't really work; I have social anxieties that inhibit me contacting others but I think I can be reasonably good company. "Dedicated family men" seem entirely orthogonal to the matter at hand. To me it's an epithet - mostly used for dead people - to say they spent time with their kids and put them before other things like their career. |
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It's very difficult to take the first step, but a good therapist can really help. Cognitive behavioral therapy seems to be a promising style these days.
If you have the desire to be around people more but something is holding you back, it is absolutely worth working to overcome that.