[Mz]

My fear is that I may need to choose between a great offer or the girl I am likely going to propose to.

I'm a woman. There is no way in hell I would move to follow a boyfriend to a new city. But, I did follow my husband's military career all over the world.

Have you considered proposing? Tell her you want to take the offer and you want her to go with you, as your wife. See if that resolves it.

[relo_worries]

I have considered proposing. Was even planning on setting up a surprise once we moved in. Then this offer across the country came up and turned everything upside down.

I'd still do it in a heartbeat, but don't want her to think I'm proposing just to lure her across the country

[Mz]

Then you should tell her exactly what you said to me here and see where the conversation goes after that. But, do give her a bit of time to digest it before you expect productive discussion. Maybe let her know the above, suggest she think it over for a day or two and get back to you.