[jmmcd]

I wouldn't necessarily go along with your logic here. If you decide not to have children for one reason or another you can implement that decision without suicide. A lot of people have suicidal thoughts at some stages in their lives, then recover and are glad they didn't take a non-reversible action.

Anyway, it's too dangerous a topic for you to work things out without a bit of "peer review". So I strongly recommend to contact a counsellor.

[subru]

This isn't occurring st some subset of stages; it's been steady throughout my entire life. And I've grown more and more cynical with age. It's a decision that I've long intellectualized.

People who don't survive aren't around anymore to discuss whether they are satisfied with their decision. Why would I waste my time talking to someone who intends to talk me out of something that isn't a debate to me? It's a personal decision.

[magic_beans]

Have you considered Buddhism, the entire purpose of which is to learn to overcome suffering? Here's a summary: http://www.bcc.ca/buddhism/fournobletruthsandeightfoldpath.h...