[phofangor]

I totally agree with ytNumbers, family and support systems make a huge difference in quality of life. If your wife needs to run out to do an errand without your daughter, she can call family today. That won't be available in the Bay Area, and you'll wind up paying someone (not to mention finding said someone).

Also, you should look into Cost of Living calculators. They will take into account your new salary, cost of living (rent, food, gas, etc.) compared to your current salary. http://www.bestplaces.net/cost-of-living/

Smaller living space and more traffic are two downsides to the Bay Area. The weather is probably nicer, though, so any outdoor living space can be more utilized.

Personally, I have allergies. That would also be a consideration when moving. Can you take a few weeks trip out with everyone to see if there are any problems (or if existing problems go away)?