[sethwm]

I would recommend exploring Emotional Brain Training (EBT) [1]. Wired for Joy [2] and Spiral Up [3] are two related books on the subject. Find a therapist that works in this space to coach you through it.

[1] https://www.ebtconnect.net/what_is_ebt

[2] https://www.amazon.com/Wired-Joy-Revolutionary-Creating-Happ...

[3] Sorry I can't find it anywhere