[Programmatic]

I think you could make your point without saying that "Most women can't handle adversity", which seems to be a dubious claim arising from extrapolation from your particular situation.

Assuming that your partners were fair-weather partners and that there aren't more layers to the situation, would you really want a partner around who wouldn't support you at your darkest? It seems coming clean has two incentives: you gain the support of someone close to you or you lose the facade of someone who doesn't seem care for you in particular (if I understood your situation correctly).