[sidlls]

It's my pay net of taxes, pre-tax savings like 401k, HSA, etc., not half my gross pay. That amount (total) is around $90k/year (give or take--I'm not giving exact numbers, here), and if you divide that by 12, roughly half (again, not exact) is rent.

My family (self, wife, two children) live what I'd describe as a modest lifestyle (for America). The home is big enough to be comfortable but not big enough to have "extras" (e.g. there's no space suitable for a private home-office). I would normally describe it as a comfortably middle-class (not affluent) lifestyle, but considering the savings and other perks the taxes pay for that'd be a bit disingenuous, in my view.

I do think the rent is excessive, though. The same home we're living in would sell for perhaps $150k-$250k (depending on neighborhood) in the location my wife's family lives. The high end of that range is a 25% down-payment on what the units in the community we live in sell for the last few months; a ridiculous valuation by any reasonable standard. There isn't as much cultural variety there, but it's not exactly a cultural wasteland (e.g. there are a variety of native-come-to-America run restaurants for Afghan and other similar foods, stores, a non-trivial presence of foreign-born non-whites, etc.). The offerings of the Bay Area don't justify the huge difference in prices.