[bougiefever]

This book helped me a lot when I was severely depressed. I too had irrational thoughts of dying and running away, and the practical exercises in the book helped me to get my thoughts moving in a better direction so I could feel better. I remember going for a walk (exercise is supposed to help, right?) and trying to think of something I like. I drew a blank for like 10 minutes - that's how bad off I was. I finally decided I liked my car - hey don't judge, it was something. I know well that feeling of trying to make yourself feel better and being unable to. For normal ups and downs in life that approach works. Not for depression.

When I was most severely depressed, it felt like I had fallen into a pit of soft, soft dirt. The more I tried to claw my way out of it, the more I would only dig a deeper hole. By learning to change my thought patterns, it was like having the hole I was in shrink until I could just step out. It is hard for someone who hasn't been there to understand. Those who suffer try so hard, but it just doesn't work.

Today, I am fully recovered and have been for years. There is hope that people can be completely healed.

[BeetleB]

>I too had irrational thoughts of dying and running away

Those thoughts you listed are entirely rational. Only very, very few folks have irrational thoughts.