[richbhanover]

> In either case, neither queue builds up in the home router -- that is exactly the problem, since we can't control the queue size in the modem or ISP! But by traffic shaping to 3.25/0.85 Mbps in the home router (either manually or automatically with fq-codel), we force the queues to build up there, thus giving us control.

YES! I understand what you're saying. (I had been treating the cable/DSL links and their terminating equipment as a black box; your description was being far more specific. Thanks for sticking with me to make yourself clear.)

And as you point out, the fix in all cases (at least, until our ISPs get serious about solving bufferbloat) is to force the home router to take control of the buffering by shaping the traffic a bit below the actual link speed. Thanks.