[josephlord]

My problem with your comment is the entitlement you claim to define acceptable behaviour of those being abused "what I demand from anyone who wants to call themselves a victim". Also people don't want to call themselves victims, they are victims who may feel able to make that known.

Letting a bully know that they are having an effect on you is far from risk free.

You also seem to believe that people have no responsibility for making people around them comfortable unless they are explicitly told it is making them uncomfortable. Everyone has a responsibility not to be ass.

[mememachine]

>You also seem to believe that people have no responsibility for making people around them comfortable unless they are explicitly told it is making them uncomfortable. Everyone has a responsibility not to be ass.

I do not believe this.

>My problem with your comment is the entitlement you claim to define acceptable behaviour of those being abused "what I demand from anyone who wants to call themselves a victim". Also people don't want to call themselves victims, they are victims who may feel able to make that known.

Well if they want my sympathy those are my standards, sorry.

And by the way this:

>Also people don't want to call themselves victims, they are victims who may feel able to make that known.

Is not remotely true.

[jakelazaroff]

>>You also seem to believe that people have no responsibility for making people around them comfortable unless they are explicitly told it is making them uncomfortable. Everyone has a responsibility not to be ass.

>I do not believe this.

Let's take this further. If your coworker pulled you aside and punched you every day when you came into work, would you say they were justified as long as you didn't tell them you didn't want that to happen?

If this person were your boss and you were afraid you'd be ostracized or fired if you spoke up, are you not a victim?

At what point can we agree that behavior is worthy of condemnation without needing to explicitly be told that it's not okay?

[josephlord]

If that isn't what you believe you aren't clearly expressing what you do believe and what responsibilities people, particularly senior people do have.

Most who come forward aren't asking for sympathy but reporting what has happened to them. What I would ask is for you to stand up if you witness inappropriate behaviour.

Some may want the abuse recognised but they all wish they weren't victims. Going public is tough, main reasons to do it are to protect others by either changing the organisation or just waning likely victims away. You stating "Is not remotely true" does not a reasonable argument make, at least put some description behind your opposing thesis.