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by dbrunton
3402 days ago
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Find someone to help. Preferably, this will be someone at work. Either someone in your job who's as stuck as you are, someone in the next layer up who needs a boost, or someone in the next tier down who needs a hand. It will be your next big challenge, to recognize that someone else needs help, to determine what kind of help that is, and to offer what you can. Your only measure of success is whether that person succeeds. The three benefits to taking this approach are: 1) it's easier to objectively measure whether what you're doing is working
2) you get to practice helping yourself, on someone else!
3) it will help you stop being an asshole, which is probably something you're doing
I hope you try it. It doesn't take very long, maybe just a few weeks, but don't hesitate to try it a few times.Good luck! |
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Helping others makes me feel good. I enjoy feeling good.
Helping others magically decreases the number of assholes I encounter in my day-to-day life. Hmm. I wonder what that means?
Helping others is a great way to make friends, to learn new skills, to broaden your worldview, reduce your stress and so on. But, really, the reward is simply in the practice itself.
The beneficial-to-me stuff is a side-benefit, and I think it has to be. This is something that you do for its own sake; you have to make a sort of pact with yourself to forget about any personal gain. The mental gymnastics required to pull that off are difficult to explain, but it is doable.
I'm pretty sure it works for people who are generally nice to be around as well. Perhaps they too are recovering assholes who make an effort to help others.
I'm not saying you are a jerk, by the way, but it seems like you might find a bit of relief by way of dbrunton's advice. Ganbate!