| > ADHD seems to be simply a code word for prescribing amphetamines to people who are confronted by the genuinely boring reality of sitting in the same room with the same people who do nothing and go nowhere for years on end. No. I have ADHD. The most obvious symptom has nothing to do with "being bored"—it's that I can't gather the motivation to practice any skill that I'm not already naturally good at, even when I really really want to be good at that skill. Similarly, I can't take care of pets, or even plants; I can't be anywhere on time; and I forget at least one thing I absolutely need to bring with me every time I leave the house. (Also, I'm absolutely never able to decide where to go to eat, rather than only unable to do so when worn out from work.) Just as a clinically depressed person will still experience subjectively negative qualia even in a perfect world, a person with ADHD will be unable to remain focused on working toward even what they would subjectively consider the most wonderfully worthwhile goals. ADHD medication allows me (that is, the part of my brain that holds my sense of identity) to take control of what "I" (that is, the part of my brain that decides whether things are worth doing right now) want to do with my life. If I (brain piece #1) am the rider of an extremely petulant horse (brain piece #2), the medication is a spur on the boot of #1, by which #2 can be brought to heel. (Now, my case is probably unusual: I went to a psychiatrist after taking an ADHD self-assessment as an adult, rather than being diagnosed as a child. But I assure you that there is at least a core group of people within the "diagnosed with ADHD" group who, like me, consider their ADHD a thing they suffer from just as much as clinical depression is for those who have it, and would find it just as much of an obstacle to enjoying their lives even if they lived alone in a cabin in the woods.) |
Meanwhile, the relief you describe is the very premise of stimulant addiction. Stimulants make people feel like capable superheroes on the up, and miserable incompetant failures on the comedown.
That is how speed works. That's why people like it. You don't have a disability. You just like speed. Everyone likes speed. Lab animals like speed, and they have no social obligations.
If you ever learned how to cook meth, while taking your meds, you'd probably never come back.