[Deestan]

I would add a "I don't know" option. Family members who need tech support from me are generally unable to answer things like:

> Is your device up to date?

First, they aren't familiar with what is considered a "device". Does it mean the calendar app on the phone (where they see observed problems)? Surely it can't mean their iPad, because that's an iPad and not a "device". The "device" must be the charger thingy. What does "updated" mean? The clock and date are correct, is that what it means? The SIM card is just a week old, so that means device is updated, right? Or they updated their calendar app, so then all is good. Or maybe "device" refers to the internet box at home? If they correctly identify it as "probably not updated", the next instruction is equally opaque:

> Update it.

This needs a "how?" answer, in addition to "okay".

[sspiff]

Most commonly, people coming to me for help make a blanket statement like "X is broken", where X could be their phone, computer, an application or website, the Internet as a whole. X is also generally inaccurate.

For instance, if the browser icon on my parents computer is moved for whatever reason, they will say that "the Internet is broken". If my mother can't figure out what button to press in a mobile application to get what she wants, "her phone is broken".

[Zelmor]

Maybe you should start with the basic concepts next time you are around. Explain things like computer, internet, operating system, programs. Just in a Feynman style of explanation, very brief and easy to understand.

Once my mother called that the tablet said it had a virus and should scan immediately. I asked what she saw on the screen, what she was doing when it occurred. It was an aggressive pop-up in an app she was using. I explained to her the intent of these pop-ups, which she understood and said that it did look fishy, hence her call. Next time I was around, I rooted their device and put an ad-blocker on it.

[Ziomislaw]

If only it was that easy. Most of the ppl having simmilar problems will only pretend to listen and remember your explanations, only to run to you with the exact same problem in a couple of hours.

[sspiff]

Exactly. They just want their problem solved, they don't care about understanding the underlying system.

It's not even about not wanting to listen, it's about the amount of information they have to absorb to understand the problem.

Also, most of us are not Feinmann-level teachers who can explain complicated systems in simple terms.

[MaulingMonkey]

It's not even about them failing to learn, necessarily - it's them failing to internalize deeply enough to recall how to solve their problems the next time they crop up. They're being handed answers from up high instead of experimenting - no practice, no wonder they can't solve it the next time either.

Even techies can run into this problem - the only reason we might do better, on average, is that we experiment with more things, and perhaps pursue more of this knowledge for it's own sake. We got sick of being on hold for tech support, we encountered issues tech support couldn't help us with, so we spent more time experimenting and internalizing the solutions to our problems.

To some degree this suggests an answer: Give people some time to try and solve their own problems. "I can take a look when I'm over there next" instead of spending a lot of time trying to remotely troubleshoot the problem over the phone. "Sure - let me just finish this up and I'll swing by" instead of dropping everything to troubleshoot a problem in-person for a coworker.

I still help my mom out some with various tech problems, but I think we've both benifited from letting her (re)develop some independence and self-sufficiency when it comes to technology.

[hectormalot]

Lack of experimentation might also be because they are afraid to break something. I remember my (completely non digital) parents being unusually good with their car navigation system. Turns out the sales rep had told them: "its impossible to break this system, just try and it will be ok", and so they had trial and errorred their way to understanding how it worked.

[Zelmor]

I am in the habit of telling them once, and I put it forward during the 'lecture'. If you are too lazy to listen, I am not wasting my time. Go pay someone to help you. I am not your support desk.

[codemac]

This is like API design though, moving stuff around and changing interfaces is a breaking change if any clients are not updated in lock step with the change.