[codegeek]

It is simple. Stop defending yourself.

Don't talk to people about what you do unless you really think that there is a need or you know for a fact that they are the right audience. Family and friends are usually not the right audience for this. Tell them something vague like "Trying to do a few things of my own" and keep it to that.

Overall, don't sweat it. 99% of people don't get this whole bootstrapper thing. They are happy to be miserable slaves in their fancy brand name 9-5 job with zero job security (there is no such thing as a job security). Ok I should not go there. Some people actually like their jobs so I should not judge :)

You just smile, move on and keep doing what YOU want to do. You are not the one to do the usual 9-5 job working for someone else.

Join bootstrapped forums [0]. You will meet plenty of people like you who will not only listen but give you the advice, support and even mentorship that you may want.

[0] http://discuss.bootstrapped.fm

[fillskills]

I don't have direct advice, but this is what worked for me. Most of my family and friends all were very disappointed when I wanted to work on my idea. Some were unsupportive, some didn't understand why I didn't want a high paying job with security. But my mind was pretty set that I wanted to do it and I had enough buffer monetarily for a while so I was able to ignore their sentiments. Plus my explanations were not helping.

After about 1 year into it, I finally was able to explain my thinking to the close ones as :"I am risking that if I work on this for a while, there is a chance that I might become rich enough for us to not worry about money for a decade. If it doesn't work, we will go back to where we already are". That clicked for almost everyone in my close relations.

[enos_feedler]

Did you have a timeline when explaining this to close relations? I feel that the people around me were more anxious about _when_ I would decide to back to making money at some big company. When someone says, how long is "for a while?" what do you say?

[fillskills]

Absolutely. I set up a 3 month recurring re-evaluation. Every 3 months I do a reality check and tell my closed ones the result of whether I want to stay in my startup or leave. This gives them the confidence that I am thinking about my life rather than having no clue at all.

[codegeek]

The key is to not get offended at that question. Just say something like "I don't know for sure. I will do this for next year or so before deciding anything". Again, the idea is brush it off and move on. Don't engage and try to divert.