[Sgt_Apone]

> I don't think I can handle this much more to the point I'm getting depressed as well (suicide thoughts)

I'd strongly suggest telling someone how you are feeling if you have not already. I've been there myself where my significant other was having physical health issues and I was just spent emotionally, physically and financially. That discussion with my spouse and family was a big turning point for all of us for the better.

[arghIdontwantto]

I have, for the first time in 5 years, yesterday I opened up to someone with all of this. People around me know she has 'problems' but not what I'm going through or how I feel. As for my wife, we've talked about this many times, but due to her illness, even if she tries to take the load off my back, it just doesn't work and things go back to 'normal' in a few days. I rather have this so-so state even though I'm in pain and exhausted, but at least my son doesn't suffer for it than put more responsibility on her so I can get better and have my son be the victim of it.

[Sgt_Apone]

That's good that you've reached out. I hope you work through it all for the better. I know it's easier said than done, but just remember to take care of yourself in whatever way that you can. Your wellbeing is always worth fighting for.