[justlearning]

you sir, have balls of steel.

could you comment on how things have changed for you over the years? I matched your dream job with patio11's comment : "I think I've got my dream job, but three years ago I said the same thing about the last job, and three years prior I said the same thing about the job before that, so your guess is as good as mine what my dream job will be three years from now."

[lotharbot]

I grew up as a smart kid with an aptitude for math and computers, much like my dad and my oldest brother. Went through high school, college, and grad school wavering between math and computer science, thinking some sort of math-with-computers would be my dream job. During grad school I made my first big shift: I realized I really liked teaching, and thought I might become a math teacher.

Shortly after, I participated in a program that paired me with a public school teacher. I liked working with the kids, but I felt like I was out of my depth (didn't have proper training to work in the classroom) and the teacher didn't like me personally (my politics weren't acceptable to her.) Here, I made my second big shift: I realized I liked teaching, but I didn't like schools, either in terms of their structure or the prevailing politics.

I ended up burned out, left grad school, and got a low-paying job teaching in an aerospace museum. Here, I had solid training, and nobody ever got on my case about my political views. At first I was disappointed that I wasn't using the skills I'd developed in grad school, and I began to envision some sort of software/systems engineering position as my dream job (my wife is a systems engineer.) Over time, I realized I didn't really care that much about the specific math or engineering stuff I'd done, I just wanted to do something worthwhile, and inspiring future generations was just as worthwhile as building airplanes.

It was in this context that my wife and I started talking seriously about having kids. Over the course of many months, we'd discussed all sorts of strategies for avoiding child care -- me working 4 10's with her part time, or both of us working 3 11's on alternating days, or all sorts of crazy schemes. Eventually I realized: when we had this discussion, she was really enthusiastic about her career, while I was really enthusiastic about kids. One of us made the suggestion that she could work full time and I could watch the kids, teach them, and be a "domestic engineer" (that is, create processes and systems to run the household), and I realized we'd just described my dream job.

So for me, it was a process of convergence -- several steps leading me closer to the realization that this is what I want to do with my life. I don't think it'll change in the same way patio11's dream job changes every 3 years (but good call on citing that comment; it was what originally inspired me to respond.)