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Entering adulthood is difficult because even though the challenges are (usually) much milder, the stakes are much higher. If you get a C on your final, it doesn't matter much. If you get passed over for a promotion, it's the first sign that you need to be looking for another job. My experience is that the happiness range of college is 4-8, with a peak around 7, and that of adulthood is 2-9, with a peak around 4.5. The range is much wider and the peak of the curve is lower, but there's much more potential upside. In college, the star performers have as good a life as the average students. The "real world" has the potential to be really amazing, but for the median player, it's pretty shitty. The fact that even the most talented 25-year-olds live in fear of being in the latter category creates a lot of anxiety, and it can be overwhelming. Some advice: Definitely see the therapist, assuming you can afford it, and make sure that you're taking care of basic needs (exercise, nutrition, sex). You said: Or if I do know exactly where I want to live, I'm always terrified that I'll regret the move later. Remember that you can always move back. No one's expecting you to buy a house. People who leave New York come back, and people who come to New York from Chicago, Minneapolis often go back. As scary as "starting over" socially is, it's a smaller cost than the upside of living in the right place for you. Besides, you probably only have 3 to 6 real friends in your city at this point, and those you'll keep regardless of your move. (New York may be a special case; it's easier and cheaper to live elsewhere and visit 2 weeks each year, which a lot of people do, than to live here, because of the massively overpriced housing). |