[dogma1138]

That's one side of it but the UK isn't the US. The US is huge if you go to college out of state or even within the same state you can be separated from your community.

The UK overall is smaller than many US states (Texas is 3 times the size of the UK, California is twice it's size). In the UK it's also pretty common to go to college/uni in the city or town you live in or nearby, same goes for work, and even if you work pretty far away 1.5-2 hours commutes are not that rare in the UK and it gets you pretty far on a train.

So while I could see how going from state A to college in state B and ending up working in state C in the US causes this rift I don't see this being much applicable to the UK. The 2nd part was also about men vs women, as the article specifically was about men in the UK does this mean that Women preserve relationships better? If so why? How do "nontraditional" gender identities and affinities affect this?

[sean-duffy]

I don't see how this doesn't apply to the UK? The UK may not be as ridiculously huge as the US, but it's still unlikely that I'm going to take a 3/4 hour train or car ride to see friends in my hometown on a regular basis. The people I met at university have ended up in jobs in opposite ends of the country. I definitely feel like the GP's comment applies to me.

[dogma1138]

I'm assuming that 3/4 is 3-4 hours, rather than 45 min, that could be in your case but the question is how "common" is your case compared to the rest of the population.

Many people I work with in the UK live still around why they grew up and commute to London.

Quite a few of them are N generation Londoners so they haven't really moved anywhere.

I've also done quite a bit of work in Manchester and Newcastle and the %age of locals there is even greater. Newcastle has Sage and quite a few other tech companies and the majority of the people I met there was from around still pretty much living where they grew up and they as sure don't have 4 hour commutes to meet their friends.

So while I can see how some one from the North coming down south to study and work or vice versa, or even moving to Scotland/N. Ireland might create a pretty big social rift due to distance I just don't know if that's the only, the main, or even a major reason for it. Might be something in our lifestyle, how we consume information and experiences and many other things that affect this. I've lost touch with most of my childhood/early adulthood friends because I've relocated to the UK. But even in my mid 20's I could remember more than one occasion on which I could not be arsed to drive for 30 min (on a company leased car so even gas money wasn't an issue) for a meetup. What It seems to me is that all of us moving from the early 20's to the mid 20's onwards just became more "lazy" as far as the effort we were willing to put into our social interaction. That too me is the more interesting part, I can remember orchestrating social events during highschool and late teens early 20's back when we had considerably less agency and free resources to do it. But a soon as all of us got high paying jobs and company cars it seemed like we stopped giving a damn.

[sean-duffy]

Yeah 3-4 hours is what I meant.

I definitely fall into the category of coming down from the North to work, so maybe my experience is different to those from London or the South. I see myself being able to keep in contact with my universities friends and see each-other occasionally since we're all in the same industry, but the common denominator for all of us is that none of us are working in the places we grew up in due to the scarcity of tech jobs in our respective areas.