[talmand]

That's not even close to the same thing.

But destruction of government property is a crime.

[knodi123]

of course not. it's mildly satirical. but for the record, I didn't say they were the same, I just implied that, clearly, bizarre legal theories about the personhood of objects are not off the table.

[jackhack]

Absolutely. When making a "Barking" sound at a police dog can result in a charge of "Assault on a police officer", anything is possible.

[talmand]

Wait, you mean insisting I was reporting a crime to a police officer is not a defense in that case?