[bzbarsky]

Organic and gluten free oil should not be too hard. Locally sourced is pretty location-dependent. Artisanal may take more work; whether one considers petroleum vegan is an interesting philosophical question.

I sense a business opportunity here; perhaps artisanal, organic, locally sourced oil sandwiches?

[pjc50]

Drill an artesian well and hope that nobody notices the spelling?

[Aloha]

can confirm; am writing business plan and looking for seed funding ;-D.