Wow. Reading that story annoyed me. Someone really wrote that with all of those obvious inaccuracies in it and someone actually believed it? THen I remember that people share shit 10x worse than this on FB and I got sad instead of annoyed.
That said, the image I linked specifically named Glyphosate while the story you posted appears to be saying that it wasn't Glyphosate, it was the co-formulants that are a problem, unless I'm misunderstanding?
Maybe a "Linux Speed Measurer" however that starts to sound like it's related to measuring the speed of your OS.
Maybe "Linux-based External Object Speed Measurer"