Whether they were funded or bootstrapped, they did a lot of speculative work or fundraising that someone earning a paycheck from day 1 didn't. It's not about working hard, it's a willingness to take risks. The person asking the question wasn't willing to take risks. They've got the $6500/mo mortgage and the comfortable life with almost zero risk. They were compensated as a wage earner rather than an investor.
Yes, working that way will come with equity, but it's table scraps rather than a full meal. If you want the full meal, you need to work on something before the company is anything. If you wait until they can pay you, that's your compensation.
Well, it seems like the OP was supposed to get stock options at these places where they worked, but somehow their stakes vaporized in some kind of finance shell game. But of course, it's all caveat employtor, right? Silicon valley companies were illegally depressing wages for years, and it's all about the individual workers not "negotiating good enuf". Fuck off. Capitalism is broken because the owners are scamming the workers en masse.
Yeah if it takes too long, initial valuation may suffer and stock options vaporize. Its dangerous to stick around after a revaluation downward, with no new stock options offered.
Yes, working that way will come with equity, but it's table scraps rather than a full meal. If you want the full meal, you need to work on something before the company is anything. If you wait until they can pay you, that's your compensation.