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by batat 3776 days ago
FRAMEWORK (shitty tragedy in one act)

Dramatis Personae

PROGRAMMER, programmer

HIPSTER, hipster

* * *

ACT I

Small room. There are a table with paper stacks, opened "Perrier" bottle, two huge monitors and a programmer sitting behind. Programmer reads papers, looks on first monitor, then on second and typing something. From time to time he says "damn idiots". Number of "damn idiots" is divided equally between papers, first and second monitor.

Door opens loudly

PROGRAMMER: Who's there?

Hipster runs into waving his hands

HIPSTER: Framework! New awesome framework! Just look, it's awesome! Just look!

Programmer looks into hipster's iPad

  @moccachino.render()
  helloWorld({
    view: "myProject.sample.view.Hello",
    div: "myContainer",
    data: {
      message: "Hello World!"
    }
  });
then takes a "Perrier" bottle and smashes on hipster's head. Hipster falls on the floor.

PROGRAMMER: Damn idiots.

Exeunt.

(sorry for my English)

2 comments

It illustrates "Chekhov's bottle" very well:

"Remove everything that has no relevance to the story. If you say in the first chapter that there is a bottle of Perrier on the table, in the second or third chapter it absolutely must land on a hipster's head. If it's not going to be smashed, it shouldn't be sitting there."

And perhaps the moral of the play is yet another variant of Chekhov's gun, but this one would be "Chekhov's framework"!

I don't see the reason why would you apologise for your english when you use the words like 'Exeunt' ... Otherwise good joke.
I understand your point, but 'Exeunt' is Latin! :P
Probably because the author was compelled to choose his words wisely to comply with forum policies. In essence "damn idiots" is a toned down version of something far more expressive.
We don't give a shit if you swear. We care about how people treat each other.
Really? Several times I thought I saw threads mysteriously being ranked downwards, only to find out they contained a formal (or other) discussion of swear words, so I always concluded that there's some sort of "shitstorm detector" at play. But maybe I'm just imagining things...
Your observations were probably real but you might have misinterpreted them. We do penalize subthreads for being shitstorms, flamewars, or off-topic. (Tediously off-topic, that is. Whimsmical offtopicness is fine.) And profanity is more common when people are upset, so one would expect a correlation. But profanity isn't a moderation concern per se.