[brillenfux]

I learned that people who need our help are rarely the people we'd _like_ to help — often enough quite the opposite.

That's why they need our help. I don't know a good answer to that problem.

[jakobegger]

...and sometimes, if we do try to help them anyway, they don't want the help we offer.

(In this case, what if the professor had contacted Alan and tried to talk him into seeing a therapist? Alan might find that offensive.)