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by zinghaboi 3830 days ago
I figured out that people bond with other people better by engaging in 'wasteful activities'. I figured out the importance of "fitting in". It is funny but I couldn't realize it in the first 24 years of my life. I had never needed to make others happy. At work, I would go about my stuff and didn't have to bother about what others thought (as long as my work was being done). In College, I could simply ace exams and didn't have to worry about what other people thought about me. People around me have always engaged in things that seemed excessively wasteful to me (going to movies, partying, drinking). And I was happy in my own little world.

Things changed when we started a company...a B2B company. We started selling at the beginning of this year and I found myself in a salesman's role (lucky me). I couldn't say no to meeting people, I couldn't say no to events, I couldn't say no to going to bars after events, I couldn't say no to partying, I had to engage in everything that I thought was wasteful. I was awkward and dumb at times but it helped me bond with people. I kept away from it for far too long, but now I try to force myself to meet people.

I know this is nothing new to most of you. But it was revelation for me. In startups, sometimes you have to force yourself to go against your very nature.

2 comments

>People around me have always engaged in things that seemed excessively wasteful to me (going to movies, partying, drinking)

How are these activities wasteful? Please elaborate. What activities would you not consider to be wasteful?

I'd define it as not personally fun or entertaining.

I don't go to the movies. I'd rather read a book. I don't go to parties. I'd rather work on my calligraphy. I don't drink - not even lightly - but I see heavy drinking as a complete waste of time (literally blacking out or not having memory of most of the previous night).

If I ever have the feeling of "I'd rather be doing something else" then chances are what I'm doing is a waste of my time. I should be doing that something else.

As someone who is also learning this, I can relate that it must be hard jumping to a sales role right away.