[vlehto]

I have MtF friend. We knew each other when we still we're both officially men. We became roommates for a year when she was mid transition.

I thought that would be cool, because I might understand women better now that I had somebody who had seen the both perspectives. How it is to be a man and how it is to be a woman.

I was wrong. She had never understood anything about manhood. Now she didn't even pretend anymore. I think there are some real and big differences between the sexes, but I still don't have good grasp about them.

[davess1]

Could you elaborate more? What are some of the differences she didn't understand?

[abathur]

I think the point vlehto is trying to make is:

He expected his friend, who he perceived as a "man", to have a particular kind of insight after the transition. Instead, he learned that his perception of the friend as a "man" was a projection. His friend would not have felt the need to transition if she felt she was a "man."

His friend could only provide more nuanced insights, because her experience was not that of a "man" becoming a "woman."

[coldtea]

I think this explanation has the opposite effect: it cheapened the nuances of what he said.

[vlehto]

abathur already got the gist of the subject.

If I asked her what women generally don't understand about men, she was unable to answer.

If I asked her what men don't understand about women, she replied with the standard feminist propaganda.

She had no special insight why women do things the way they do. (makeup, skirts, etc.) And she was unable to spot any non obvious differences between the sexes.

She's really not stupid. Just lacking perspective. Just like I am, but from different point of view.