[tomp]

> but there is a problem of sexism where a man will talk over women. If those women assert themselves they're often not seen as assertive or powerful, but pushy and bitchy and shrill

I don't think that's a problem with sexism, but with how a person does it. If you're used to talking over others, you usually do it in a "smooth" way, when other people make pauses, or you say something very relevant. On the other hand, when someone gets annoyed that they can't finish, them being annoyed is off-putting, and they also often say things like "let me finish first" when you already know what they will say, so they come off as struggling to gain power and influence.

Edit: I think, on the other hand, that making people communicate faster and dynamically search for the optimal speaker makes communication more efficient and is better for everyone. No shouting needed.

[harryjo]

The rude behavior you describe is not intentionally sexist, but it has a disparate impact on women, who statistically tolerate interruptions more.

Often times when you think you know what they are going to say, you are wrong, putting words in their mouth.

[tomp]

If it's not intentionally sexist, it's not sexist at all. Sexism is discrimination because of someone's sex. Any other claim of sexism is irrelevant and a classic statistical error, the Simpson's paradox. It's as silly as saying that doctors are sexist because they prescribe more contraception pills to women than men.

> Often times when you think you know what they are going to say, you are wrong, putting words in their mouth.

Yes, sometimes, but in average the effect is positive (i.e. the communication is more efficient).

[kaitai]

Sexism has to be intentional? You're redefining the word simply so you never have to deal with it. It doesn't even jibe with your own definition ("Sexism is discrimination because of someone's sex."). People do many things unconsciously, and systems push people toward certain actions without engaging the conscious consent of those involved (a fancy way of saying we humans often take the easy path rather than the thoughtful path).

You can certainly be an asshole without being intentional about it :) Try and argue that's not possible!

[tomp]

Right, "intentional" was not the correct word. What I mean is that sex has to be the primary motivator/discriminator of the action (whether the motivation is conscious/intentional or subconscious), not just a statistical artifact, as in your example with interrupting people and women tolerating that more.