[lrvick]

If you are optimising for having nice accommodations for your family, but never see them, you get points as a provider I guess, but you fail at being a parent or spouse.

I would of waaaay rather of lived in a trailer, and grown up actually having a father around, instead of some distant workaholic male figure that is the "great provider" that allowed an upper middle class lifestyle.

For some I feel being far away making money to send home is the easy way out of having to actually be a parent.

[saiya-jin]

... and by providing kids too much you actually spoil them easily and make... worse people out of them? or more likely they don't reach their potential as human beings, at least not that easily.

I mean, look around you, there are usually plenty of people who had it damn easy in life. this generates weakness. I am very happy I had to work my way up by myself, no cash cushion, no free apartment when turning 18 etc.it builds character to rely only on oneself, a priceless and one of most important lessons in life.

I say give kids good sporting equipment, give them free quality education (tricky bit in some places, but more expensive isn't automatically better for them), love them, support them and give them freedom, and you are excellent parent. rest is up to them.

[hiram112]

Part of raising kids is providing them with the means to excel - good nutrition, education, clothing, etc. In our society, this equates to money.

While I understand it is not fair to trivialize a typical stay at home mother, it seems we've pushed the pendulum too far to the other side, where the typical working father is damned if he works a lot to pay the bills, and damned if he cuts down in order to take over more parenting duties. He's either a workaholic male or a deadbeat. Can't win.

And yes I realize that some two parent families have reversed gender roles, but the statistics still show the stay-at-home mother and working father are typical, at least in the US.