This is so misguided. Just make the hardware(all features incl suspend, backlight etc) work with the LTS + latest version of Ubuntu and we would all be happy. And don't restrict it to one under powered model, with a shitty screen.
Another way of looking at it is that if we are deemed to require Puppet/Chef/whatever/etc preinstalled when we buy an Ubuntu laptop from Dell, then maybe these things should be present in a standard Ubuntu install anyway.